It has been a while, due to some unforeseen issues with my brain damage resulting in a intolerance for sound I had to step away from music, and blogging fell to the side as well. They’re just wasn’t enough I wanted to talk about or get out there.
Brain damage is a fickle partner to live with. No matter how hard you work at maintaining your balance, sometimes out of nowhere problems arise. And you never know when they end and how long the good streak lasts.
In order to maintain some rhythm of work going I read more and got my exercise up. Mostly this leads to improvements on the long run. I am currently on the way back and try and listen to music and went out to the cinema for some non action movies on downtimes.
I have also written down lots of ideas which I can incorporate into my music. Which will be soon I hope.
I am running behind on my blogs, didn’t have time too scribble about week 28, due to other activities, mostly out of the house. Week 28 has been a week with lots of difficulty showing up. Starting any activities regarding my music ambitions was very hard.
I really value the rhythm I have developed and letting go of that rhythm is hard. It’s the same feeling I get when I can’t run. And that’s not even factoring in the positive effects both have on my wellbeing.
Yet this week has been all about having a hard time getting started with any of the activities I can normally swap between depending on my energy levels. And when I got started I had to give it up pretty fast.
I know its a case of falling down and getting up again, this week however was mostly falling down.
I will write about the previous week at the end of this week, making sure I get some of my Rhythm back.
Doing a fast forward like in a cassette deck like in the old days isn’t part of this journey. How frustrating it might be, my learning curve is what it is. I can’t speed it up or make my brain any faster. However there is a remedie to it, of sorts. Just carry on and persevere.
This week has seen it’s fait share of music activity. Mostly working with the modular & done some reading as well. My workflow is getting more and more of a final shape and proces. And thanks to limiting my setup I get more results out of my sessions. Simply because I know my way around it better.
I did however notice that I can’t always bring myself to not grabbing something else, another machine or more modules. Just because it gives me that extra bit of energy, or push my levels of fun. I love discovering new things and for me that’s a large part of the fun in making music. Discovering new and uncharted waters.
So I am having a bit of trouble committing myself fully to my new and smaller setup. I get lost in my Eurorack, or when patching in MAX MSP, despite the limitations I set before starting my sessions. Just because it’s easy to get distracted and it’s just loads of fun.
So it’s hard for me to maintain a balance in having fun and doing exactly as planned. It doesn’t matter how well I plan things, I am too easily distracted.
Bit late with this post as I closing in on the end of week 18. Well sums up the delays in my music making journey I suppose. But week 17 has been a good week of the music front. I’ve been playing around with my Eurorack synth and recording most of it. Also spent some time working on making samples out of the results.
All in all I got to spend time making sounds, which was great. On the inspiration side of things its been a good week as well. Got some design books & magazines and had a nice chat with a designer on how to set intentions for your creative path.
It’s about setting the parameters of a project, or a session to set the tone or the direction of the desired result. Which can be as random as just sitting down and making sounds, or drawing random things, and hyper detailed and focussed tasks like sculpting the perfect kick drum from scratch.
It all has it’s function. And it can be utilized to break habits, periods of creative drought or simply to regain the fun in a project. Very interesting stuff.
Another week done, this week I realized that my initial goal of making an album might be reaching too far for the timeframe I have at the moment. Especially given the learning curve I still have. Now I have the idea to take on a smaller project as an intermediate step.
This is one of the biggest benefits of having my coach as sparring partner, talking about ideas to keep the momentum and keep the process goals intact. Without getting distracted too much in pursuit of the bigger end goal. So this week I have invested time in learning Ableton and coming up with an idea for the smaller project.
planning was as follows :
- Ableton Live & Samples.
- Working on a standard patch.
- Sketching the idea for the smaller project.
- A coaching session.
First part of the week was working of the overflow of activities from the previous week. The standard patch is thought out and written down. I’m almost there on a method to write patch ideas down pretty fast and being able to perform them later.
Most of my time was spent on learning how to work with samples in Ableton.
I took my time on that so that cut into my music making hours. Just to get some extra milage on the learning objectives.
I have also come up with a few notes on how to put together a smaller in between project. To set me up for a good effort in going trough the whole process going from idea to finished project. Without it having to be a complete album.
Fun event this week was meeting up with my coach and another student at an event for a workshop and small live performance by my coach. We had some fun and interesting conversations as well. Thanks for the fun people ! It’s always fun to get out and meet people.
Starting a new project , making an album. And as with many bigger goals in my life in the last few years , I got some expert help guiding me along the way. The idea behind this is I can get up to speed a bit faster and avoid some common pitfalls along the way.
It’s also a shift from making music pure as a hobby to something more serious. Going after a goal I have had in the back of my mind for ages. Whether I have the guts of actually releasing it remains a question. But that’s the idea.
I will try and write a weekly update on the process , for the first week it’s mainly about writing the concept of the album down on paper and making a rough planning. That alone gives me a focus and energy in going forward.
I love running, I also need it as a way for clearing my head and stay as fit as possible in order to be able to manage day to day activity and keep my balance. As I have mentioned before, after my brain injury , my running prior to the accident saved my life. And it also gave me tools for persisting during my revalidation process.
As with running revalidation starts and ends with keeping at it, and with most things in life this helps a great deal. Being conditioned this way has helped me true rough patches and kept me sane during periods when my brain simply gave in. So all in all running means a great deal in my life.
For this year I am going to write more about running and my day to day with brain damage. As a lot of people can’t really imagine the effects it has on life. But I am starting out with running. I have ran a few marathons and my personal best is 3:17:22 seconds. Which I am very happy with.
Ever since I have ran this fast I am contemplating if it’s possible to run a sub 3 hour marathon. In my case getting 18:17 seconds off my personal best. Which is a bit steep. But if I don’t try I will never know. So I am starting a journey which hopefully gets me under the famous 3 hour barrier.
I have said it , I want to run a marathon under 3 hours. And now you can all help me do this. Any training , nutrition and general tips are more then welcome ! Let’s go!