Today it’s been exactly one year since I was released from the hospital. It’s also the day I had my last visit at the revalidation centre.
A few weeks back I had my second Neuro Psychological test which showed little or no improvements in most tested arias. Which means this is it. Medically speaking there is little or no chance it will improve any further. Although this is not unexpected it’s pretty disturbing nonetheless. Somehow I always felt I could beat it. Rationally I already knew it wasn’t in the cards, emotionally it’s very different. The planning and preserving of energy is something I will have to keep doing for the rest of my life. A normal full time job is out of the question.
The main focus and most important one is now accepting my new life, new limitations and find a meaningful path in life within my new limitations. I already took steps in that direction by searching for guidance in figuring out what it is I can still manage work wise. But I would be lying if I said all is well right now. Because this is really the end of the line in the recovery of my brain.
I’m going too need time processing and really accepting it.