Author: Cornerman

Minimalism

Watched “Minimalism: A Documentary About the Important Things”, on minimalism. Short version of the definition is living a meaningful life with less. Less stuff, meaning less material possessions, and stop the never-ending chase of more stuff.

Giving more space for time , perusing life goals , and focussing on experiences and way less on chasing materials possessions. I have been interested in this subject for a while now. The documentary outlines the trade off between time , money, material possessions and valuation of these items in life. So If I buy this product, what will this add to my life. It’s not advertising getting rid of all of your stuff. Just ask the question will owning this make me happier. For example , my record collection is an ongoing source of happiness, listening to the records, feeling the records, cataloguing them (yes even that) makes me happy. So should I get rid of them, no. Because they add value to my life. That’s the important question.

It’s not about living out of a suitcase and owning nothing, it’s about making life interesting, intriguing and happier when you get rid of the things that don’t add value to your life. Changing your way of thinking and getting out of the more and bigger is better rat race , rewards you with more time spend on things you value the most. It reduces your financial obligations and lowers the need for a high paid and high stress job as well as the need to finance your life , or should we say lifestyle.

It’s interesting because when thinking about it, you work hard , have less free time and what do we do in general, we spent our hard earned money as fast as possible in our limited free time. And the race continues. Advertising and popular culture creates this goal people trying to achieve, whether it is consciously or not. And a lot of people seem on auto pilot in that direction in one way or the other.

Trying to think about life differently is hard, for me it is anyway. Because ‘success’ is still measured with your job, financial position and stuff you own. While it should be measured by what makes you happy in life, not what society’s definition of a happy and successful life is. Food for thought.

What’s better ?

What’s better?, interesting question. While having less energy too spend on any given task it also has advantages. I used to do a lot of things simultaneously and as fast as possible , because I wanted to do a lot. I find a lot of stuff worth doing or exploring. And it’s a lot of fun. Learning new stuff. As a result I never really found the focus to concentrate on one particular thing. I always did it all, let’s take hobby’s as an example. I like too listen to music, make music , photography, writing and drawing. Mostly I only did one of these things for an hour a week at most.

This week I looked trough old files I found in a back-up, bits and pieces of sketches, unfinished music and maps of photo’s that never really went anywhere. As I am searching for new ways too train my brain and expanding my focus it needs to be a small task which can easily be cut into very small pieces. Well any of my hobby’s will do this just fine. I have some musical instruments I haven’t mastered yet, this can be nicely done in 10 minute intervals. Editing photo’s or reading about how it actually works can also be cut into little pieces. And writing as well.

By being limited I can now focus better on one thing at a time , and not allow my brain to go all over the place. Because it’s simply too exhausting. When working on stuff for just 10 minutes you need to define the task to strict boundaries. Which has helped creativity enormously. Less is more is really true , well for me now anyway.

What else has become better, time spend with friends and family. Which has always been very valuable, but now I appreciate it much more. This sounds very very cliché , I know. But it’s true. So everyone, you know who you are, Thanks for spending the time and being patient with me.

The time I can now spend on actually working on the recovery has been a better experience then I thought it would be, It’s given me insight in myself and I am now figuring out what’s important. One thing I learned is that everybody needs some time to figure stuff out, taking real rest and moments for reflection. So I encourage everyone to really do this. Not just for an hour but regularly and consistently over time, rest and think about life, it’s worth it.

Writing really helps

Writing seems to really help me sorting out my thoughts and get a clear view. Being unable to do basic problem solving I now write everything down. Mostly on paper.

I also work like this when writing my blogs. I make notes and then work on them over and over again. I can manage these writing sessions pretty well, and they are relaxing.
I am not yet very good at it, but it seems like a nice activity to expand. It can be done almost everywhere , on my own time and when I have enough energy to do it.

As this blog seems like a nice but bit ancient way to get my thoughts out there I will go forward and try to at least write something once a week. I don’t know If that’s a pace I can keep up but it’s worth a try. Only thing to figure out next is how to get anyone to read my ramblings.

Missing the action

Slowly adapting to my new self I am almost confident enough declaring the following , my energy management system works !
Yes it took a lot of time and painstaking tweaking but I now now what I can and can’t do on a given day.

The next step will be figuring out how to up the ante a bit. And the most important part of all , sticking with the slow progress mantra.

I have some experience and some perseverance when it comes to getting things done, for example running , following a nice training plan and feeling the progress almost every step. If I see a clearcut goal I can really get into most stuff and follow my plan. If I think it’s for a well defined and reachable goal.

My biggest asset has always been my ability to break my own boundaries, and thus by doing that almost all the time I reached the majority of my goals.

As I have mentioned before now it’s more important to manage the energy and reach goals without breaking any boundaries. Which for me is as hard as it gets. But I never fully realized this.

Working on stuff until late really made me feel alive, whether this was the smart thing to do , I found the grind very enjoyable.

It made me feel buzzed in some way, working hard and hitting targets is addictive, I now know it is. And after having a few brushes when pushing too hard I always found my way back to it. Even when a lot of the daily stuff is mundane and boring, I now tend to miss the action and dare I say the stress.

Funny how life works , last couple of years I tried to minimize the action and stressful parts of my work and going back to the fun stuff , but how ?

Well mother nature found a way, and in doing so made me realize that I needed too constantly pushing myself, turns out I never wanted too loose the action. I was somehow addicted too it. It’s also the thing I miss the most lately, I read an old ‘Bucket list’ when researching what to do next, and It was full of great stuff I wanted too do , and some I already started. When reading it I also realized that taking on one item off that list would be a massive undertaking, especially doing it in a way not to fall into my own trap of going non stop until it’s done.

I have never been the smartest kid in the room , but by methodically working on stuff and simply putting in the hours I managed most of the time. It has been my greatest asset. Pushing my limits and figuring the rest out as I go. I can no longer rely on this. By learning to do everything ‘slow’ it sucked the fun out of it a bit. The action so to say. It’s a bit terrifying knowing I will not be able to get that part back.

It’s also the automatic braking system I always needed, I more than ever need to pick my battles. It opens up a lot of creativity and possibilities. Figuring out how to apply this is the next step. Progress is here to stay.

Debt reduction versus Cash flow and future risk

It’s something I have been thinking about a lot lately, since borrowing money is cheap at the moment and it’s getting easier to refinance existing debt to lower rates this has me puzzling.

Mostly because I have always had a view of getting rid of it as soon as possible. Now that I have reduced most of my debt it’s been tempting to add a bit of debt in order to generate a bigger passive cash flow. Basically to invest more and get a bigger overall return on my investments. Now that brings a new factor to the table. My one and only debt at the moment is a mortgage on my house. The value of the house exceeds the outstanding debt by a fair sum, the interest is low and secure for the coming 22 years. After 22 years I will be mortgage free anyway. The risk is that I can’t generate enough income to pay the monthly cost.

Since I have been sick this is a risk, I now receive a goverment pay out which is not guaranteed , 2 scenario’s can happen. My condition stays as it is today and I will not be able to return to work , which gives me a stable income from the government. Which is lower than that I can make working in my old profession.

The second is that I return to a job , which will hopefully be possible. The people I work with already prepared me for the fact I can’t return full time and working in my old profession. So again a lower income. By reducing my monthly mortgage payment and interest burden even more agressivly I can minimize risk further.

On the other hand I can probably have I higher rate of return by investing the money in other asset categories, and thus create a cash flow that in the future will pay me much of my monthly costs. Meaning the mortgage and including food, insurance, etc.

For some reason I can’t really figure out a course of action where I feel absolutely comfortable. I know that when I would have been working the risks are much the same but my confidence is somewhat less since I have been sick and progress is going as slow. Maybe this is something to worry about later on in the proces. Well Just wanted to write about this little bit of doubt in my mind. If anyone has some useful advice please feel free to contact me.

October 2016 – Dividend

October is nearing the end and I am once again doing a round of dividends, it’s been a good month on the markets for me and I am slowly getting more insight in how to value company’s.
More on that later though. For now just the numbers.

28-10-2016 Dividend (Product: DOW CHEMICAL COMPANY ) EUR 3,91
26-10-2016 Dividend (Product: CISCO SYSTEMS INC. ) EUR 6,19
25-10-2016 Dividend (Product: GENERAL ELECTRIC ) EUR 4,30
14-10-2016 Dividend (Product: WHOLE FOODS MARKET IN) EUR 1,15
14-10-2016 Dividend (Product: W.P. CAREY INC. REIT) EUR 8,37
3-10-2016 Dividend (Product: COCA-COLA COMPANY (THE) EUR 4,46

Total EUR 28,38

Redesigning everyday life – Change

Change, it’s slowly but surely making it’s way into my everyday life, a change that I meet with resistance one time and embrace on other moments. I am now getting better results from my new planning system and also being a lot more aware of my energy. A challenge is too really relax and take it one day at the time. It’s mostly the day to day stuff that’s getting better. Less crazy dips when I should have been able to avoid those. The avoiding is going well, after being inside for almost a complete week due to a knee injury I found that staying inside actually helped in controlling the amount of incentives , consequently I kept avoiding going outside. Which I am now doing a again every day. I can’t stay inside all the time, so I am now picking that up again. It’s also important too maintain a social life and keep connecting with people. Also something I need to focus on more. The new way of distributing my energy should yield a better base line and more stability in the next 3 or 4 months. After this point I can gradually increase my activities.

With all day to day stuff going better I slowly need too look ahead. I am now trying to get permission to get a coach with a lot of experience in getting people with cognitive problems back to work, since I am now receiving payment via the government they have too approve this. So hopefully I will have a meeting within the next few weeks. So I can get this started.

So all in all many good things, in many small steps.

Portfolio news – October 2016 changes

New name for the monthly posts , changes instead of additions. Why, well I sold one position in my portfolio. My favourite sneaker manufacturer Adidas. I bought it back in November 2015 and sold it last week. The question is why of course as I am very long term. First the appreciation is very substantial in this period. I can’t really add any more to the position without tipping the balance in the portfolio and as a result also the dividend percentage dropped significantly. For me the valuation just got a bit too high and the payout of selling was very attractive.

I will still follow the company and I am sure to buy it again at lower levels. As for the addition this month it has been BMW the German car manufacturer that will along with the rest of the established auto motive branch , according to all the experts lose from Tesla. But until that happens is a very good investment. It has had some downturn last year and at the beginning of this year and is now slowly getting out of that hole. It’s around 80 Euro at the moment which is not cheap but simply good value. Debt position is average and should increase.

Dividend is 3,20 Euro per share which is around 4%, fair result. Another reason is I am spotting a lot of people looking at BMW as their new car. Maybe not the usual market indicator but one famous fund manager always said, look around and buy what you see people buy and company’s you understand. Along those lines anyway. So it’s all about the Germans this month.

Redesigning everyday life – Carpe diem

The biggest question of all, how far will the recovery go. Nobody knows the answer, or can give you a range. I knew that from the beginning. What I didn’t know is what it meant for me and everybody around me.

I am slowly learning what it means. I have to give up my desire to control things, which is hard to do because I have always had some sort of plan and knew if I followed the plan , the goals would be reached. Most of the time anyway. You can’t win them all.

I’m trying to let go of my old ways of doing things, which was to work hard and work harder if it didn’t go as planned.
Fighting was my number one response if events didn’t go my way.

It was my first response in my recovery, I wanted to get back to normal as fast as possible. So I went back to work pretty quick and set out to up my activities almost on a weekly base. Not just the hours at work but also activities at home. I felt tired pretty quick but tried to fight it and push on, which normally worked upon till some degree. I kept this up until my contract at work ended and I felt just how much energy this had taken. And I suffered the inevitable set back most people experience in their recovery. I had tried to train my way out of it. But it’s not sport or even studying were you put in the time and effort and it mostly pays off in the end.

I was simply draining myself and burnt the energy I needed to recover. So after the dip I had to really rethink the approach and take taking my time to recover seriously. I talked about this period with the people who help me recover and they said it was time for me to accept my current situation and not trying to compare everything to the way I was and did things before. Most of the progress is with acceptance and trying to live one day at the time. So it was back to the drawing board, the result was a new system for energy management which allows me to go into more detail when planning my energy and some extra help in acceptance and the psychological side of things.

The new energy management system will show results after 3 to 4 months give or take. If the balance is solid I can them go and experiment further. the other part is the acceptance bit. Given the results of the Neuro psychological tests I can’t expect to fully recover to my former self in terms of concentration , analytical capabilities and information intake and memory. Most likely I can’t return to my old job. The funny thing is , I was already exploring other options before I got this. Off course the cards have been shuffled differently since then, and I never pulled the trigger on those options. It was easier and way faster to go back into my ‘old’ job then it is to make a real switch.

Now I have the opportunity to explore things I am really passionate about , and step outside of my comfort zone and habits, without going all practical about it all the time. I have never taken these kind of exercises seriously in the past, Amusing yes, but my practical side always took over and I just continued with life. In general there are always more excuses to stay on a course that feels safe and secure, or feel that way. So when I was told that it’s a good exercise to brainstorm what it is that makes me happy in life, my first reaction was a bit sceptical.

But then again what do I really have to loose ? All my prior attempts failed because of self imposed boundaries and limits. And without having a solid outlook I just as well go and think out of the box and give this a real shot. I always found people living by the day a bit naive, never planning ahead seemed like a path to certain failure. But now it’s really time for me to incorporate some of that ‘Carpe diem’ in my life and find out where it takes me.